Ironic

Hard to admit but it's true, I am a control geek individual.

I get stress when situations are pushing me to wander to a different direction. I love to have that sense of jurisdiction in most circumstances. I find myself stronger and calm when i have that containment and mastery. This applied specifically when it comes to my family and work.

I know life can't be all planned and flawless. There's glitches and imperfections along the way, and i think this is where I have to learn and regroup.

"Yesterday was the worst. Everything was falling apart. It started with crazy/quick/maybe somewhat nasty delivery at work {if only my room is set to go and my fetus is behaving, hey i am good to go myself}. Then because i was running late from work, the traffic meets me with open arms --- just imagine i haven't had sleep and i am driving?!?! i was probably on the road for almost 2hours. Worst the GPS that i was using brought me to the wrong place --- i was about to throw it out, seriously. Got home unsure if a man with a blue coat is following me since i was driving like a maniac on the road, i kept looking at my side mirror the whole time by the way. Then attempting to get a sleep while the girls are squeeking/giggling in front of the TV... The pleasant piece that day/night was work call me and put me On Call last night and didn't call me in --- an angel was still watching over me. Praise the Lord! "

Here are some of the schemes hub and i talked:

☀ Find a person that can come to our house and watch our girls when situation arises like yesterday and the next coming days/nights, {i cannot do it, i can't contain guilt free exiting and just watch them scream my name everytime i leave them behind a daycare}

☀ To ultimately get a daytime shift position soon or maybe bring my current position down to part time for now while awaits an available spot.

♥ ♥ ♥


"I let go of the past by accepting that it happened. I create the future by visualizing it and taking bold action today!"

The Daily Love